With a head like pumpkin

Valerie: "Oh, yes, I've gone from a B to a D, Barbara."
Nana: What's she had done?"
Denise: "Implants, Nana."
Nana: "Ooh, are you alright sitting in that hard-backed chair, Valerie?"
Valerie: "Oh, yes."
Nana: "Oh."
Barbara: "Oh, they're lovely, Valerie. Jim, don't Valerie's implants look lovely?"
Jim: "They're great them, Valerie."
Denise: "Lovely, them, Valerie."
Barbara: "Dave?"
Dave: "Mm?"
Barbara: "Aren't they lovely?"
Dave: "Yeah, they're smashing, them...er...two, Valerie."
Barbara: "Oh, Valerie, Mary next door will be really sick she's missed 'em."
Roger: "I got her them for Christmas, you know."
Jim: "Oh, well done."
Roger: "She didn't want them. She wanted a Dyson."
Barbara: "Oh, well, I'd love a Dyson."
Denise: "I'd love a Dyson."
Valerie: "Actually I got a Dyson as well."
Barbara: "Oh, Valerie, what a Christmas! Implants and a Dyson!"

In Royle Family

By Bean & Crumpet